I Like it Like That
by Hey.There.Elizabeth
Summary: After a year, Meredith comes stumbling back to Seattle Grace. She was expecting Chief Webber, it had only been a year, right? But the person behind the chief's desk surprised her, Derek. What she found hardest? She still loved him. [MerDer] CHAPTER ELEVEN
1. Chapter 1

**In the light of the sun**

**Is there anyone? Oh it has begun.**

**Oh dear you look so lost.**

**Eyes are red and tears are shed.**

**This world you must have crossed yourself.**

"_Derek let me go." She cried uselessly trying to free herself from his grip. "I'm going to Boston, that's final. I need a new start. I need to be away from you. Away from lies."_

"_No, Meredith! Stop running. Stop running from everything, from me. I messed up big deal." He shouted as he finally let go of her, but grabbed the cab door before she could close it._

"_Derek you don't even understand." She yelled through streaming tears that mixed with thunderous rain water._

**You don't know me, You don't even care.**

**You said you don't know me, You don't wear my chains.**

_She wasn't leaving him because she didn't trust him or love him. Her reason for leaving was one she would only understand. Meredith loved Derek with all her heart, but she was leaving so that he wouldn't get hurt. So that he didn't have to deal with the cloud of gloom she brought everywhere she went. She was bringing him down._

**Essential yet appealed, carry all your thoughts**

**Across an open field.**

**Well the flowers gaze at you.**

**You're no the only ones who cry when they see you.**

"_Meredith please." He said with concern and heartbreak in his eyes. Thunder roared above them, causing Meredith to jump, her fear of thunder taking the best of her. _

**You don't know me, You don't even care.**

**You don't know me, You don't wear my chains.**

_She collapsed back into the seat in a fit of tears and with a final yank pulled herself up and the door closed. Her hand pressed against the window and so did his, her final words barely visible through the rain. I love you._

**She said I think I'll go to Boston.**

**I think I'll start a new life.**

**I think I'll start over where no one knows my name.**

**I'll get out of California, I'm tired of the weather.**

**I think I'll get a lover, Fly him out to Spain.**

**I think I'll go to Boston, I think that I'm just tired.**

**I think I need a new town, to leave this all behind.**

**I think I need a sunrise, I'm tired of the sunset.**

**I hear it's nice in the summer, some snow would be nice.**

**Boston.**

_Derek hit the door with his hand as it reared into drive, pulling the love of his life away. How could she leave him like that?_

* * *

Meredith's memories flashed through her mind as the wind wisped around her and the front doors of Seattle Grace. A year ago she had been walking out those doors, out of the life, out of herself. She figured Derek had left the hospital after she did, just seeing his hurt face that day had nearly killed her. And with that Meredith pushed open the front door and slipped her finger over that too familiar button that made the elevator go up to floor four, the surgical wing.

* * *

Derek sat in his office looking over the file that had been placed in front of him by his secretary. There was no way that the name on the file was the person who was coming to see him for a job. They had to be playing some sick joke on him, Mark possibly.

That day was the day his heart was ripped out. He had walked around since completely immersed in his work and a broken man. He could barely breath anymore, he felt his chest caving in. It had been a permanent and painful feeling ever since that day. Her face flashed through his mind, the one that had mouthed those three final words to him.

Supposedly she didn't love him anymore, he didn't believe it. Derek tried to convince himself that she didn't, in hopes that the pain would go away and that he could forget. It hadn't proved to be helpful. He knew that she loved him, she couldn't stop as she once told him. There was no other guy, she had left the state. Some stupid line up at Boston Mercy. Derek swallowed hard and swiveled his chair around so that his back was to the door. The name plate gleamed on his desk, Chief Derek Shepherd.

* * *

"Ma'am, the Chief is ready to see you." Rhonda, the Chief's assistant called to Meredith.

Meredith sat properly and upright in her chair, running films in her mind of how Richard Webber would be happy to see her, probably welcome her. The man that had torn apart her family had also been the closest thing she ever had to a dad.

The old surgeon had slept with her mother in open on-call rooms, but her oblivious father had blown all of that over, acting as if none of it ever happened. It had happened though, and so had her mother's death, her step-mothers death, and the new-found hate her father held for her.

One year ago, her father had told her that he never wanted to see her again. She found herself to gloomy for anyone to love, even Derek. She knew he did, but she still felt that she was saving him. He needed fresh air.

Meredith wiped a stray light tear from the inside of her eye. She couldn't keep Chief Webber waiting, she certainly had made him wait long enough. Meredith gave a small smile to Rhonda, the same assistant from all those two years ago when she started her internship. Rhonda slid an old, wrinkled hand over the door handle and opened the grudging door with a small shove.

* * *

"Chief, Miss Grey is here to see you." She said, fully aware of the past that the two had.

Derek heard Rhonda's voice, the door open, and the small footsteps that he easily recognized enter. He hadn't heard that light footstep in months and it was a relief to his ever aching heart. She was here, in all her glory, really here. He swiveled around in his chair to greet a shocked face, Meredith's.

* * *

She had been expecting Chief Webber, but the chair turned and her mouth gaped, struggling for air.

"D-Derek…?" she let out quietly, practically inaudible.


	2. Chapter 2

Okay, here is my second chapter. It was fun to write.

Next chapter will be her going to her house to find Izzie of course, but someone else she hadn't quite expected. I bet you can guess who it is. Someone who starts with an A.

REVIEWS. :

Derek gave a half charming smile, her presence alone making him feel more alive. He stared at her shocked feature for a moment. He stared at the golden blond hair that caressed her shoulders, a lock falling peacefully over a glistening green eye. He made eye contact, his ocean blue gaze meeting her sea foam one. His body moved without his mind telling it too, but before he could reach her she was out the door.

* * *

What was he doing here? He wasn't supposed to be chief, or even in this hospital! Meredith fumed, but she couldn't help her weak knees as they felt like they were about to give out. What was she? A flustered high school girl. She couldn't get weak in the knees over a guy, especially Derek Shepherd. She had jumped that ship ages ago.

She turned on her heels, quickly walking back out the door that she had entered only moments ago. Rhonda stood up slightly at her desk as Meredith ran past, tears on the verge of beading down Meredith's face. She ran straight to the elevator, pressing the down button this time, one that she had also pressed millions of times.

With a ding and a small creak, the doors opened and Meredith stepped in, shoving her finger against the door close button as many times as she could. But of course she wasn't quick enough, Meredith Grey never was.

* * *

Derek shoved a leg and part of his upper torso into the elevator as the doors began to close, forcing them to open. He looked at her face and his own finger pressed the door close button. Tears were streaking down her face, making her green eyes stick out even more lustfully. He wanted her, he couldn't deny it. This was the moment he had waited for almost a year in time.

"Meredith." Was the only word he could muster.

"Derek, leave me alone, please." She said through her shaky voice. Her voice was weak, feeble. It made him want to pull her into him and suck her in, protect her.

He pulled the emergency stop button, the scene being all too familiar. The last time they had been trapped in this elevator together was after their one-night stand. She dropped her files, shoved him against the wall and hungrily kissed him with passion. Though it only lasted for seconds, the memory was quickly growing as his favorite. He had lived of memories of her for the past year.

"I can't leave you alone Meredith, that's the problem." He finally yelled, almost too loud. He had pent up anger in him, lust that was just begging to get out. But he couldn't name it lust any longer, it was another L word. Love.

"Yes you can, it's easy. You walk away!" she yelled back, dropping her bag to the side. And he couldn't help himself, he had always thought she was cutest when she was mad. She was bossy, it kept him in line.

* * *

Meredith breathed in and out heavily. She didn't need to see him now. She had left him to help him. Her mother had died, her father had hated her, and she felt as if she was drowning Derek in her own sorrow. She couldn't put him through misery. So she packed her bags and stumbled into the nearest taxi, Derek chasing after her. She thought she had been doing a favor for the person she loved most. She didn't deserve him. And when she felt that the coast of Seattle Grace was clear, she meandered back to it to find a horrific Derek with sunken eyes.

Meredith's breathing steadied. Her heart stopped racing, slightly. But her knees were still buckling at the sight of him, damn him for having that effect on her. She ran a hand mercilessly back through her hair then once again returned her gaze to him and his broken man persona. She let out a small cry and strode forward, once again shoving him against the wall and forcing himself upon him, her soft lips meeting his with angst and hunger.

She slid her hand behind his neck as his own slid around her waist, their mouth meeting with love and mix of lust.

* * *

He had waited a year for this, and he wasn't about to turn it away. She fit into his strong arms perfectly, her thin figure fitting into all his kinks and crooks. He flipped her around so that she was against the wall, he pulled away for a moment to look at her. The mix running down her face contained exhaustion, deprivation, lust, love, sorrow, and excitement. He couldn't help but muster a small laugh as he gently thrust his mouth back upon hers.

She had seemed so upset to see him, but had she secretly been lusting over him? Of course she had, her face showed it. He knew it. He knew that she still loved him no matter how much she denied it or hurt him.

* * *

Meredith opened her eyes enough to realize what she was doing. She was dragging him down again and no matter how much force it took for her to pull away, she did. Physically drained and angry at her body and heart for acting so irrationally, she pushed in the emergency stopped button and grabbed her bag as the door open. She stole one last glance at his face as it hurt and pined after her. She stepped back in for a second and with all the strength she could muster the pointed her index finger from him to her.

"This cannot happen again. For my sake, and yours." She said, her voice cracking as her heart wept.


	3. Chapter 3

**Okay so this is my newest update. Chapter three. It's kind of long, my longest so far at least. I'm pretty srue you can all see where this is going.**

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Grey's Anatomy or any of it's characters, although I would give up all the chocolates and sweets just to have Dempsey.**

**Haha, REVIEWS please. :**

* * *

Derek stood there, leaning against the elevator wall, dumbfounded. He was in a trance, or a very cruel nightmare. Every time he dreamed about her return, it was more extravagant. She would waltz into his office, knowing of him becoming the new chief. Then she would throw herself upon him and apologize profusely between kisses and express her grief and regret. They weren't meant to have their happily ever after weren't they?

Miranda Bailey stepped into the elevator with Derek and snapped her fingers a few time in front of his face.

"Hey, Hey! Chief of surgery my ass. Acting like a damn love struck teenager." She rolled her eyes, but she couldn't help but second guess who the quickly passing figure had been. "Was that who I think it was?"

"Yes, it was Meredith." Derek frowned as she snapped and smirked slightly at her comparison of him and a teenager.

* * *

Meredith found herself once again standing in front of a familiar door, once again pondering why she was about to enter. 

Nothing had changed, everything was the same. The seat swing on the front porch still sat there, and so did the flower pot beside it. Izzie had given up on her hope that Meredith could take care of it, and instead took care of it herself.

With a deep breath, Meredith wandered anxiously up the stairs and knocked loudly against the door. It was getting dark, they were probably sitting down to a family dinner. One that she wanted to be at. She heard footsteps moving lightly across the floor, and she also saw a familiar top of a blonde mane through the window in the door.

Meredith put on her biggest grin as the old oak door opened and gave a little wave as Isobel Stevens stood there, gaping at the presence before her. Meredith had left them, and Izzie certainly hadn't forgotten it. She hadn't forgotten the moping that George had done around the house before finally moving out with Callie, ahem, not one of George's most brilliant ideas in Izzies opinion.

"Hey Iz." Meredith said coolly, acting as if she had never left Seattle.

If only it could be that easy. Nothing was ever easy for Meredith Grey, and that was her thought at the exact moment that Izzie slammed the door in her face. That was certainly something she hadn't expected from the blonde, maybe from Christina, but definitely not Izzie. Meredith glared and sighed, not exactly in the mood for being shoved out of her own house.

A new round of thunderous tears formed in her eyes as the grey clouds above her began to rumble slightly, causing Meredith to curse her luck and fear of thunder and lightening.

"Damnit Izzie! Let me in." she yelled through the door, shivering at the feel of a raindrop against her neck. She pounded on the door with her fist, matching the loud sound of the thunder above her. She heard yelling from inside, but the reasonable voice was not coming from Izzie. It was coming from some guy, George maybe?

Yet again, Meredith had been wrong. The door finally opened to cease her knocking and a familiar and unexpected face appeared in it. Alex Karev shoved the door open enough for Meredith to enter under his arm. He gave a small glare at the fact he had been yelled at by his girlfriend just for Meredith. Meredith, the idiot intern who had accidentally thought of as a nurse on their first day.

"Alex?" Meredith asked in a confused tone as she padded into the house.

"Yeah, in the flesh. And thanks to you I'll probably be sleeping on the couch tonight. Somewhere that you should be." His cocky tone coming out in his voice.

"Wait, you and Izzie?" Meredith asked, trying to suppress the laughter that was practically yearning to escape her mouth.

"Do you have a problem with that Mer?" he asked, sounding slightly offended.

"N-no," she replied, but was slightly cut-off by the blonde she knew so well darting passed them and up the stairs. "You can't stay mad forever Iz." She yelled after her.

"Watch me." Izzie yelled back bitterly and she slammed her door shut.

Alex shrugged and looked back at Meredith, she looked hurt and damaged her thought. "She'll get over it." he mumbled quietly.

"Yeah, I hope so." Meredith nodded slightly. "My room still open and there for me?" she asked, looking up the stairs towards the door that had been slammed so many times for her and Derek.

"Yep, just the way you left it." He said, looking in the same direction, his eyes moving far off. "You really hurt everyone Meredith."

Meredith glared slightly, him being the last person she needed to lecture her. "I know, and I'm sorry. But now, I need to go to sleep in my own room."

"You know where it is." He said before stomping up the stairs to comfort Izzie.

* * *

Derek jumped in his car, knowing exactly where to find Meredith after his shift and after looking first at Joe's, her house. He knew that she needed to sleep somewhere. Derek pulled out of the parking lot and jumped on the freeway, his body on autopilot while his mind raced at a hundred miles an hour. 

He found her house with ease, he could make the drive in his sleep. He remembered all the times that Meredith just wanted to sit outside with him, even when it was raining. Derek looked up at the rain, listening to the thunder, knowing how scared Meredith must be. He felt the need to protect her, and do so much more than protect her. He needed her just to live day to day.

Derek stepped out of his car and into the pouring rain, letting his love sick teenager side take over him. He picked up a few rocks, weighted them. He hadn't done some this stupid or adolescent in years. But he would do anything to get Meredith, she was the love of his life. As the lightening and thunder clapped above him, he chucked rocks in rhythm at Meredith's window, one that he had spent many hours looking out.

* * *

As she rocked back and forth on her bed trying to drum out the sound of the thunder, Meredith heard a noise. It wasn't a noise that she familiarized with, like thunder of lightening. It was new, and it was coming from somewhere in her room. Meredith frowned slightly and stood up, listening for the direction that the sound was coming from. 

Finally it struck her. The window. Was a tree hitting it, or was it her imagination? Meredith wandered over, a confused look plastered to her face. Her heart leapt, her breath quickened, and she felt her knees buckle. He was there, in his jeans and jacket, probably freezing and starting to get a cold. Meredith shoved up the jammed window and barely stuck her head out.

"What are you doing?" she yelled down to him, jumping slightly at another clap of thunder.

"I'm here to be your knight in shining whatever, I'm here to talk." He said earnestly, his charming smile smacked across his face.

That smile was enough to make Meredith want to jump out the window and into his arms, riding of into the sunset for ever, even if there was no sunset.

"I don't need one, go home Derek." She said with a dry tone and she shoved her window closed again.

* * *

Derek sighed and slowly wandered back to his car, taking several seconds with each step. He couldn't let her go, he didn't want to, his heart and body wouldn't let him. She was his air, no matter how dark and twisty or bright and shiny she was. He wanted her with her mood swings and everything. His anger and want taking the best of him, Derek ran up the steps, slopping water every where with each step. 

He pounded against the door, loud enough to wake the neighbors if any bothered to listen to them. He breathed heavily, clenching his fists slightly to get rid of his nerves.

Meredith opened the door quickly, at least quicker than Derek had expected and glared at him with a cold stare that seemed emotionless. Derek knew her better than that though.

"I don't want to go home. I want my girl in the bar, I want my bright and shiny and dark and twisty Meredith, I want you to keep me in line with your tiny ineffectual fist." He said, grabbing her with small force and pulling her into him, his chiseled chin resting on top of her head. "I want you, I love you. You are my oxygen, and everything I need to live."

Meredith tried her hardest to push him away, but with every push he increased the power of his hold on her. He was much stronger and she couldn't fight any longer. She collapsed into his arms finally, her head fitting perfectly between his neck and shoulder, sobbing ever so lightly.

"Derek," she cried quietly, but enough for him to hear. "Why are you putting yourself and me through this?" she gripped his jacket with her tiny fists and let him guide them over to the swing on her porch.

Memories laid on this swing, some great and some sad. Neither he nor she wanted to remember anymore. He just wanted to live in that moment, holding her as she cried and thought about everything she could do or what had happened. It wasn't his ideal reunion, but he was still holding her.

And he was her knight in shining whatever.


	4. Chapter 4

Not my best update, but Meredith needed to be strong and Derek needed to take care of her and be cocky, and I had to introduce Christina.

REVIEWS.

**And I'd give up forever to touch you. **

**Cause I know that you'd feel me somehow. **

**You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be.**

**And I don't want to go home right now.**

_Meredith slid back against the cream colore__d hospital wall of Boston Mercy. Her first month or two hadn't exactly been heaven. She had managed to pull of some major surgeries, but every time she went to any hospital or any hospital area, she was flooded with memories. Her back slid down the wall until she was sitting on the cold tile floor, her knees bent and her hands resting delicately over them._

**And all I can taste is this moment  
And all I can breathe is your life.  
Cause sooner or later its over  
I just don't want to miss you tonight**.

"_Doctor Grey," a husky voice mumbled as a pair of mint green scrubs appeared next to her. "How are you?" he asked in a nonchalant tone._

"_I'm fine." She muttered quietly, looking up at Doctor Stanley, his empty brown eyes staring down at her._

**And I don't want the world to see me,  
Cause I don't think that they'd understand.  
When everything's made to be broken,  
I just want you to know who I am**

"_Good, so you'll accompany me to the bar tonight for a quick drink?" he asked, a crooked smirk appearing on his face_.

**And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming.  
Or the moment of truth in your lies.  
When everything feels like the movies,  
Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive.**

_Meredith had two choices, she could go and pretend like she was having a good time, or she could admit it to herself that dating someone right now wasn't the best plan. She was in love with Derek, any other man would hurt her._

**And I don't want the world to see me,  
Cause I don't think that they'd understand.  
When everything's made to be broken,  
I just want you to know who I am.**

"_You know what, I'm actually busy." She said with a lopsided grin as she pushed pass him, the man left with his mouth agape. To his knowledge, no one had ever rejected him._

**And I don't want the world to see me,  
Cause I don't think that they'd understand.  
When everything's made to be broken,  
I just want you to know who I am.**

_It wasn't time for her to go home to Seattle, she wasn't ripe enough, and it still hurt too much. But Meredith wasn't to sure about how much longer she could stay away. She just hoped that when she did go back, Derek wasn't there still waiting_.

* * *

They laid still for another half hour or so. Derek didn't dare move, the moment was too precious. He had waited much to long for this, for her to fit her slender form back into his strong physique. He felt her breathing steady, her small torso moving in and out in rhythmic beats. Meredith was asleep, in his arms, much like the last night they had been together. She was even wearing the same ratty old Dartmouth t-shirt. The one he loved. 

With no effort and one easy swoop, Derek was standing up with Meredith in his arms, struggling to turn the handle on the door. The door slid open with ease, but still creaked slightly at the force of his push. He wandered up the stairs that had been stumbled upon many times as he and Meredith wandered in after one to many shots of tequila, and the memories flowed through his mind until he reached her bedroom.

His face fell slightly as he saw the bed, where he and Meredith had first been together. He laid her down gently, pulling the comforter up around her shoulders. She shivered slightly at the new found cover, causing her fast to scramble slightly, but she quickly adjusted and sighed slightly in her sleep. Derek took a few steps back until he fell into the chair next to her bed, propping his head up in his hand. Even if he had to watch her sleep, that was enough to make him feel alive for one more day.

Derek watched her until he felt his eye lids start to droop, then finally fall until he drifted off into a sound sleep.

* * *

A buzz and ring came blaring into Meredith's ear. Her hand fumbled over to the nightstand, slapping down a few times until she felt her cell phone ringing under her hand. Without bothering to look at the name she flipped the phone up and pressed it against her ear. 

"Hello?" she said groggily.

"You bitch; you didn't even tell me you were back! Me! Of all people!" a voice yelled into the phone, causing Meredith to sit up slightly in her bed.

"Christina?" she asked, a dumbfounded look plastered to her face.

"No Einstein, it's Izzie, the one who refuses to talk to you yet told me you were back because you were to chicken to!" the voice, now recognized as Christina barked.

"Christina, I'm so sorry. Everything has been fast paced since I got back. I meant to call you; I wanted to, I dialed the number and everything." She stumbled for words, her sentence staggering.

"Oh save it. I'm your person! I should have been the first to find out." Christina said, her voice level dropping slightly.

"I know," Meredith replied quietly, staring at the comfortably sleeping form of Derek in her chair. What the hell had happened?

"Christina, I really need to call you back." She said into the phone with a weak tone.

"Meredith, don't you dare ha-." And that was the last thing Meredith heard before she closed her phone.

She would much rather sit and watch his sleeping form, breathing in his scent and his presence, but she remembered that if she loved him that she would have to play the card of dislike. Meredith scowled and picked up her pillow, chucking it at his head. Derek stirred slightly, jumping as Meredith hit his shoulder with her fist.

"Wake up!" she said in a furious tone

"W-what?" he said irritably, rolling over slightly.

"Get out!" she hissed, throwing his jacket at him and pulling his arm up until he was out of the chair.

"Well," he said after a yawn, "This reminds me of our first night together. You throwing me out. You never change." He laughed a cocky smile on his face.

"Out!" she yelled one last time, practically hurling him down the stairs and out the front door. "We'll talk later." She whispered as he turned back towards her.

"You start tomorrow by the way. Don't be late." He said, walking backwards down the porch, smirking as she slammed the door in his face with a glare.

"She wants me, she knows it." He laughed.


	5. Chapter 5

**So chapter five is up, and I love this chapter.**

**Reviews pleaaaase.**

**

* * *

**

Meredith busied herself all morning in work, making sure to avoid Derek, though it was quite hard seeing as he was Chief. Meredith sighed as she ducked past yet another corner and dove into a patient room, grabbing his chart and pretending to look over it like it mattered. She heard the door creak open, and for a moment she thought that her worst nightmare had come true. A lean figure was resting against the doorframe. Meredith squeezed her eyes tightly and turned towards the male figure, stepping back in slight surprise at the figure.

"Well, if it isn't the infamous return of Meredith Grey." The doctor said in a sly tone.

"You are the last person I wanted to see today." She mumbled through gritted teeth.

"What? We couldn't at least have a happy dirty mistress reunion? I was really looking forward to the dirty mistress part." Mark Sloan smirked with arrogance.

"Leave me alone Sloan." She said with a glare in his direction.

"You're avoiding Derek, he told me so." Mark blurted, smiling at the anger she was now showing.

"N-no! I am not, I'm just busy." She replied stammering for words. Meredith scowled and pretended to examine the watch on her wrist. She looked up and pushed past Mark, making him lose his balance against the wall.

"You can't avoid him forever!" Mark yelled after her, smirking at her small wave over her shoulder.

* * *

_Meredith slammed her car door shut, exhausted at her inevitable avoidance of Derek. She had tried her hardest, lost all of her strength, and yet deep down she did want to see him. Meredith had fought with every once of her being, trying her hardest to resist that McDreamy smile. She turned a little too quickly and stopped abruptly at the figure standing in front of her._

"_Crap." She said a little too loudly._

"_Crap? You see me and that's your first reaction?" he asked, a frown slowly finding its place._

"_I'm late." She stated, turning on her heel and walking in the opposite direction, well aware of the footsteps jogging behind her._

"_You're avoiding me." He said with a small smirk._

"_Yes, and I'm late." She replied with useless effort._

_

* * *

_

Derek leaned back against the wall, rubbing his temples with his forefingers. She was avoiding him, and she had been all day. He had seen glimpses, a few flashes of her golden hair flying behind her as she ducked into another patient's room. Derek punched the wall, his fist slightly red, and waited for her to come out.

* * *

Meredith wasn't only avoiding Derek, but she was also avoiding Christina. Their phone conversation had been anything but peachy. She was afraid of what the petite yet fiery dragon would do to her. She had done an amazing job at hiding from Derek, and she was doing a superb job of hiding from Christina, until she felt a shove on her shoulder.

"Hey!" she snapped fiercely, rubbing her shoulder.

"That's what you get. It's like self-induced karma. Deal with it and suck it up. You deserve everything that happens to you." Christina said with a smirk as she pushed past Meredith, shoving her once again.

Meredith scowled, rubbing her arm where she had been shoved once again. Christina had turned into a bitch, with good reason. Meredith smirked slightly and turned a little too quickly, throwing her and the tall, dark, and handsome figure in front of her into a fit of déjà vu.

"Crap." She muttered, thinking back on her earlier flash back.

"You never change." He smirked slightly, also remembering their last conversation about her avoiding him. "You still find the need to avoid me."

"You hush." She pointed a finger accusingly, her eyes darting around, finally landing on the open door of an empty on-call room. "There, now."

"Seems like someone wants to reenact last night." He said, biting his urge to laugh as Meredith shoved him in, locking the door.

"Shut up." She yelled her green eyes full of rage and small glimpse of lust that he wasn't meant to see.

"Meredith." He said quietly, noticing the way she was acting, practically fuming.

"No, shut up! I yell, you listen then you talk. That's how it works. That's how it has always worked." She said, breathing heavily.

"Fine, and you have to yell first don't you?" he said, leaning back against the frame of the bunk bed, folding his arms across his chest as he stared at her, his deep ocean blue eyes searching hers for a sign of anything but anger.

"Yes, I do." She said matter-of-factly. "I didn't want to come stumbling back here to find you. I left for a reason. At the time it was pretty damn good too." She said, unable to control the level of her voice. "I was a wreck, and you were starting to be one. You needed time without me, you still do. I'm a downer, I don't care, and I know it. I'm dark and twisty, but sometimes I'm also bright and shiny." She paused for breath.

"Meredith," he started again, only to be shushed as he felt his heart caving in.

"Shut up, I left because I thought I was doing a favor for you by hurting myself. It hurt, of course, but I got over it. Then I come waltzing back here to find you back in my life. It's not fair." She said, a small tear running down her face. "So, if you're ready to break up with me fine. Tell me that you don't love me; maybe it will make it easier for me to let you go for once. But I do still love you, just incase your wondering. I'm just trying to help you stop drowning in my problems." She yelled, finally more tears streaking down her face.

Derek inhaled deeply, "Is it my turn to talk?" he asked.

Meredith only nodded and wiped a stray tear from her face.

"Good, because I do love you. Don't you see? Don't you understand? You're the love of my life. I can't leave you. I want your twisty moods, and I want you when you're bright and shiny. Hell I even want you if I am drowning in your problems. Because even when I am drowning, you always manage to save me." He finally said it, not that he had been the one afraid of saying it.

Meredith's shoulder shook slightly as more tears streamed down her face. Her pale and slender hand wiped a few away, but missed one or two. Just as she brought her other hand up to stop them, it was replaced. His hand had reached out, much bigger and rougher, and wiped the last tear away from her face, a smile plastered to his cheeks.

Meredith looked up, she took a step forward, letting go of the door handle for once. Within a millisecond she had forgotten about her worries and slipped her hand behind his neck, and into her soft hair, pulling his lips down to meet hers. The feeling was overwhelming, the kind that almost made her knees buckle again. She opened her mouth, letting him deepen the kiss.

She had forgotten how it felt to kiss him. The lust, the desire, the love. She realized that what they had had all months was not just lust or desire, it was love. She pulled away for a moment, removing a hand to push a stray lock of dark hair from his eyes.

"I love you." She said quietly, smiling.

Derek gave a lop-sided grin, probably his biggest ever, and pulled her into a tight embrace, one that he never wanted to end.

"I love you too." He whispered into her ear.


	6. Chapter 6

**Not my best, but please review!**

* * *

Meredith elbowed Derek's side as her pager went off. The on-call room was dark, almost perfect for her and Derek, except for the small annoying beep that was coming from her pager. Meredith groaned and shoved Derek after he resisted the pain of her elbow.

"Derek, get up." She giggled quietly, slipping out from underneath his arm. "I need to go." She whispered, nudging him one last time with her leg before turning around to leave.

"Noooo you don't." he suddenly grabbed her wrist, restraining her from taking another painful step forward.

"Well, unless you want to hear a call go out about a code blue on floor four, your gonna have to let me go." She smiled, knowing that her leaving would kill him. She bent down, her soft hand touching the stubble on his cheek, lowering her lips to linger for a moment on his, leaving a small kiss.

Meredith pulled away and laughed as she waved over her shoulder, listening to him groan as he was left alone.

* * *

She was Satan. Satan in a beautiful, curvy, tiny ineffectual fist way. But Derek had always liked the bad side of things, and if Meredith was Satan he wanted to be the guy who died just to go to hell. Sure he groaned when she left, her thought about her all day, he breathed in her scent even if she was half away across the hospital, and he could still feel her skin against his.

Derek stopped by the nurse's station, leaning forward on his elbows while examining the multiple pieces of white paper in front of him. They were a jumble of words, and he swore that he had seen Meredith written on the page. Was he really that much like a lovesick teenager? Well he really didn't mind, as long as it was Meredith driving him crazy. Derek felt a punch hit is right arm, his first instinct to turn round quickly and deck the person back, but he stopped quickly realizing that it was a curly headed intern,  
Yang. Christina Yang.

"Ow," he scowled, running his arm. "What was that for?"

"You knowing that she was back before I did." Christina said nonchalantly, raising her fist to throw another punch.

"Hey!" he yelped, grabbing her fist. "I'm your chief, you can't do that."

"You were McDreamy first." She muttered back, lowering her fist and turning quickly on her heels to stomp of in the opposite direction.

"Well I still am McDreamy to some." He smirked at her mumbled under her breath.

* * *

Meredith snagged a cup of coffee after her surgery, and had managed to snag one extra, hoping to find the one person she wanted to talk to. Meredith wandered through the hospital with a quick pace; she rounded the corner, her eyes landing on someone who could help her.  
"Alex, where is she?" Meredith asked in a hurried tone.

"Avoiding you, but she's in that exam room." He whispered, pointing to an open door that quickly swung open as the blonde bombshell emerged.

Their eyes met, Meredith's pleading for a moment to talk, Izzie's full of anger and sorrow. Izzie turned, detemerined to run from the golden haired bimbo that was following her, but Meredith was too quick, cornering Izzie into the desk behind the nurse's station.

"Coffee?" she asked in an inviting tone, one that so very unlike the dark and twisty Meredith everyone was used to.

"I don't talk to strangers." Izzie replied back bitterly.

"Iz, I know I messed up. But you can cut me some slack, I had good reason at the time." She hissed under her breath.

"No Meredith, I don't have to cut you some slack. You just packed up and left without a word, leaving your friends and family worried sick. I don't have to cut you some slack." She shot back, a little too loud. Izzie looked down at the coffee and bit down fiercely on her lip. "But I will take that coffee." She said, a small smirk on her face.

And with that smirk, Meredith knew that they would soon be on the path to being friends, again.

* * *

Joe's closed late. It closed later than any bar, and it was lucky enough to be right across the street from Seattle Grace. The bar was Meredith's beautiful and loving second, no more like third, home. She slammed a shot glass down, a small clink following it, and slammed her hand down once, signaling for another shot of tequila. It would be her fourth, nooooo, fifth.

She could lose herself easy to tequila, it was her poison. Meredith barely realized how much she had drank, who was around her, and who had slipped into the seat next to her with a confused expression until she lifted her head, tossing it back to down another shot.

"McDreamy, baby, you look fabulous darling." She said with a giggle, handing Derek her empty shot glass.

"I love drunk Meredith, but I love sober Meredith too you know." He said, a concerned face plastered on.

"Oh I know, I just hadn't seen Joe in a while! He was the only one to welcome me back happily." She said, grinning from ear to ear.

"Yeah you've had one to many, come on Mer, let's go home." He said, sliding her shot glass across the bar, clinking with the others she had placed down.

"Ohhh, but I just got started." She whined, pouting her lip. She realized Derek wasn't going to give up, and sighed out loudly. "Fiiiine, bye Joe." She said cheerfully, waving as she pulled on her jacket and followed Derek out, him leading her with his hand.

"Put it on my tab Joe." Derek yelled back. He protectively led Meredith to his car, opening the door for her, helping her in, and buckling her in.

"Derek," she said quietly once he was in the car himself. "Can we go to your place, that is if you still have the trailer?" she leaned her head back, resting against the seat.

"Sure, why not." He said with a charming grin, a McDreamy grin.

"Good." She said with a content sigh.

The rest of the ride was in silence, Meredith seeming as if she was going to fall asleep at any given moment. He stroked her hand, letting his thumb rub over her knuckles as she smiled. The drive was short, he had made it millions of times. Meredith managed to pull herself out of the car and was standing on her own, an amazing feat for her after five shots of tequila.

She snuck around, wrapping her arms around him in the darkness, sighing into his chest, breathing him in at the same time. Breathing in his essence, his scent, his breath.

"There you are you sneak!" she giggled into his sweater, clutching the fabric in between her tiny fingers. Her other hand slid down to meet his, lacing their fingers. She pulled away from him, but planted a quick kiss on his cheek, and dragged him into the trailer. She let go of his hand as she collapsed onto the bed in a fit of giggles, rolling over on her side to see his figure standing next to the bed, grinning down at her.

Her emotions got the best of her, they always did. Meredith smiled up at him, and once again linked their hands together.

"Derek, I love you… in a really, really big… pretend to like your taste in music, let you eat the last piece of cheesecake, hold a radio over my head outside your window, unfortunate way that makes me hate you love you. But mostly love you." She said with a content smile.

Derek chuckled to himself and slid into the bed next to her, his body enveloping hers into a perfect fit, his arms sliding around her waist.

"I know, and I love you too." He said, finally able to say it to her face without the fear of her running again.

He meant to say more, to match what she had said, but he was silenced by the small snore she let out next to him, showing that she had fallen asleep in happiness after he said just three words to her.


	7. Chapter 7

**So, I tried to add a bit of drama, but still keep them happy. It was tough.**

**The first song lyrics are "Stars and Boulevards" by Augustana**

**The second is "I Saw it on Your Keyboard" by Hellogoodbye.**

* * *

**Wait dear, a white horse is walking down my street here,  
your words are creeping at my feet  
I fear, sunrise will come too soon and you'll disappear  
Into the haze of this city and go south...**

She heard voices, a female voice to be exact, coming from outside the trailer. The other voice was deep and growl like, but not husky. The voice sounded as if it resented the person standing in front of it. Tip-toeing her way to the door, she pulled it open quietly, but the second she saw the site in front of her she felt like slamming it closed again, but her mouth stood agape and her heart felt a twinge of pain.

**Look out, they're coming after us with big guns,  
They're only gonna tell you all the bad things I've done  
Even if the words they say aren't true, they've won,  
And I'm left here dyin' in the sun**

Derek leaned against a pillar on the porch, some leggy brunette standing next to him. Her voice was husky, not his. She reached out and touched his cheek, running her finger along it. Derek flinched, pulling away slightly, easing Meredith's heart. The girl looked up slightly, noticing Meredith standing there. Her gaze turned devilish, and she leaned in, planting a kiss on Derek's lips.

**Oh...seems like I'm always on my own,  
Seems like I'm never coming home  
Seems like I'm always on my...  
All the stars and boulevards ain't close enough for you...**

Meredith gasped for air, feeling her chest cave in and her mind went fuzzy. McDreamy was more like McAss. Meredith backed up, causing a loud creak to erupt from the floor behind her, also causing Derek to turn around quickly. He saw her expression, the hurt, the pain, and he felt as if his whole world was about to cave in, not just his chest. He bolted, taking two steps at a time up the stairs, but the door slammed in his face, and he heard her muffled sniffles and her feet scrambling to pick up all of her clothes.

**Late nights, won't do me justice  
Cause when I drink...I just get so damn depressed,  
And it's...  
It's not like, I ain't trying to get over you.  
It's just hard to look at all the seasons, pass me over too...and I say**

"Meredith," he opened the door. "That's not what it looks like, I swear."

"SHUT UP!" she yelled, a fresh tear rolling down one cheek. "It is what it looks like, some leggy brunette feeling her way up you." She sniffled again and pushed past him as she pulled up her sweatpants from the night before, walking out the door.

"And who is this Der baby?" she brunette asked, causing Meredith to stop and glare momentarily.

**Oh...seems like I'm always on my own,  
Seems like I'm never coming home  
Seems like I'm always on my...  
All the stars and boulevards ain't close enough for you...**

"It's none of your business Melanie." He replied coldly, running after Meredith, pounding on her car door as she slammed it shut. "Meredith please."

**One last phone call from you, it wouldn't hurt much,  
I'd just like to hear your voice and pretend to touch,  
Any inch of you that hasn't said it all or read it all  
Or sung my life away**

It was déjà vu again. Him pounding on the door, her crying, the clouds above roaring. Except this time, Meredith didn't mouth anything to him, she drove away, but the tears were still rolling down her cheeks.

**And I say oh...seems like I'm always on my own,  
Seems like I'm never coming home  
Seems like I'm always on my...  
All the stars and boulevards ain't close enough for you...**

* * *

Derek leaned back in his office chair, his eyes red from lack of sleep and depression. She drove away, she ran again. She didn't leave the state, but she left him. It hurt just as bad as the first time though.

"_Aww Derek, sweetie, I think it is my business." Melanie pouted, twirling a perfectly curled piece of hair around her finger, her devilish grin still on her face._

"_You did that on purpose!" he yelled, running his hands furiously through his hair._

"_Maybe I did, maybe I didn't. But it's your fault for bringing your one-night stand back to your house." She said, smirking in bitterness._

"_Meredith is not a one night stand, I'm in love with her. I love her." He yelled again, looking at Melanie with eyes of rage._

"_You can't love that bimbo Derek, she's just finishing her internship." Melanie shot back, hurt by his words. She was in love with him at once, but of course, he hadn't loved her back._

"_Damnit Melanie! She's not a bimbo, she's Meredith Grey. The love of my life, and you can't change that. You need to leave, now." He said quickly, walking over to her car and opening the door._

"_Derek, she's not what you need, she can't make you happy." Melanie muttered as she slid into her car seat._

* * *

Meredith did make him happy, it was all he wanted. He wasn't about to second guess being in love just because some other bimbo wandered back into his life momentarily. He couldn't let things get in the way of him and Meredith anymore. He had to corner her, even if it had to be in public. Derek shot up, his heart full of purpose and desire. He needed her, he couldn't live without her.

"Rhonda! Have you seen Dr. Grey?" he shouted, looking around the hall.

"Yes, Dr. Shepherd, she ran that way about two minutes ago." She said, pointing down the main surgical wing hall way.

Derek took off at a run, all of his senses about keeping them a secret leaving. He saw her, leaning over the nurse's station, her file open as she scribbled furiously away at the prescription details. She looked tired, beat down, defeated. Derek sighed, taking in her appearance, the way he had hurt her.

"Meredith!" he yelled, jogging up to her, grabbing her arm before she could turn away. "You don't understand Meredith." He pleaded, his eyes smoldering rather than glistening.

"I understand perfectly, you found some other woman to satisfy your needs. Apparently I couldn't." she hissed under her breath.

"Meredith that's not it. You really don't understand!" he whispered, his grip tightening on her arm slightly.

She couldn't hold it any longer, her eyes were starting to water, and her voice had to be heard.

"Then explain it to me!" she yelled, struggling to free her arm, but his grip was stronger than her yanks, causing her to pant for air after a good minute or two of trying to run. Meredith looked up at him, a tear finally rolling down her cheek.

"Fine, I want to." He replied calmly, caring less and less about who was watching them. "Melanie is her name, she is an old fling. Just a fling." He repeated. "She was in school with me, not med school though.

We had a thing, and she had stronger feelings for me than I did for her. But she's the jealous type, that's why she did that on purpose in front of you the other day. To get a rise out of me, and to break your heart in hopes that she could have me back."

"Well then, why don't you go running back to her since she seems to love you so much." Meredith said bitterly, her eyes leaving sadness and filling with anger. She didn't like to share.

"I can't do that Meredith!" he said, his voice rising. He let go of her arm, but grabbed her hand instead, and despite her struggling, he pulled her into him, wrapping his arms around her tiny waist. Her hands pushed against his chest, trying to get away, but she couldn't, soon giving up and dropping her arms to her side.

"You see, I can't do that because my heart is already gone. And no matter how bad you handle it or hold it, it's still gone. It's yours, I gave it too you two years ago, and I don't ever plan on asking for it back." He said, grinning as she gave up, he always thought she was cutest when she was mad.

**There exists a melody  
That just might change your mind  
Oh! If only I knew the key  
To sing to make you mine.**

"Seriously?" she asked, irritation in her voice. "Seriously?!" she said louder again, this time adding a punch with her fist into his arm.

"Yes, seriously. And everyone in this hospital can hear it." He said, pulling her closer, tightening his grip. Her felt her sigh and slowly lift her arms to wrap around his waist, barely making it all the way around.

**Then I saw it on your keyboard  
You saw it on my sleeve  
I never knew a heart existed  
Outside of make believe  
Until I saw it on your keyboard  
I knew at least that I might have a chance  
To catch a shooting star**

"Okay, I'm sorry." She said, huffing. "I just don't like sharing." She said with another shake of her body, but this time with a small hint of laughter.

**There exists a star above  
That always steals my stare  
And there exists a star on stage  
That never seems to care**

Derek grinned and lifted her face out of the crook of his neck, kissing her lightly, a small peck on her lips. He stepped back and grabbed her hand, lacing their fingers. "Well good, because I love you." He said, nodding.

"I love you too." She said, smiling.

**Then I saw it on your keyboard  
You saw it on my sleeve  
I never knew a heart existed  
Outside of make believe  
Until I saw it on your keyboard  
I knew at least that I might have a chance  
To catch a shooting star**

"Good, because now that the whole hospital knows, you might as well get used to saying it in public." He stifled a laugh, grinning at her glare.

"And let the rumors fly." She sighed, tip-toeing up to give him a quick kiss on the cheek before walking away.

"Oh, nice. Leave me to handle the first round of rumors." He shouted to her, laughing at her small wave over the shoulder. She was as stubborn as a mule.

**There exists a melody  
That just might change your mind  
Oh! If only I knew the key  
To sing to make you mine.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Where ever there is a break like this --, it means that I'm switching between points of views.**

**You guys wanted it, and I was happy to write it. Here it is, REVIEWS!**

* * *

"I heard she got knocked up, had an abortion, and then crawled back to him. Apparently he wanted to have the baby, but she refused to hear it. How did such a sweet soul end up with that wench?" a frizzy haired blonde nurse whispered to another.

"Well, I heard that she was a stripper that seduced him in college, and then she went to med school and surprised him when she showed up. I never thought she looked like she could satisfy a person." One scoffed, smirking as Meredith walked past them.

Oh how the rumors had been flying for the past day or two. Meredith had to clench her fists at times, just to pull herself out of her angered state. The frizzy blonde had been saying the same things for the past two days, whispering behind Meredith's back and even practically to her face. The only person who could match her anger with the whole situation was Christina. She could barely deal with hearing Meredith's name all day. It practically killed her.

Meredith leaned back in her chair behind the nurse's station as she scanned over the neurology consult she had seen, only half paying attention to it. The frizzy blonde snickered as Meredith looked over, but Meredith couldn't help but laugh. The nurse had liked Derek since the first day she saw him, but he never gave her the time of day no matter how much she bothered him. She wouldn't get the picture.

Meredith felt a familiar pair of hand fall over hers and close the folder. She grinned, her cheeks becoming flushed, as the hand interlaced hers, stroking her knuckles. She leaned her head back into the chest of Derek, sighing slightly. Derek leaned forward, planting a kiss on her forehead, causing the nurse to lose all color to her face. She was pale, and then she was cherry red. Almost as if she was so angry at embarrassing herself.

"Hello there." Meredith mumbled quietly, stifling a yawn.

"Hi Miss Grey, how are you doing today?" he asked, planting another kiss on her temple, causing the nurse to huff.

"Dreadful. Nurse McFrizzy over there won't shut up. Neither will her freckle faced red-head friend." Meredith spat through gritted teeth.

"Oh, don't worry. I'll fix it." He said, giving Meredith a devilish smile before removing himself reluctantly from her shoulders and making his way over to the nurses, causing them to smile and laugh at a cheesy joke he cracked.

--

"So," he said after cracking his joke, McFrizzy staring at him with an awe filled smile. "Any of you meet my girlfriend, Dr. Grey, yet?" he asked, watching their faces drain with color. "I hear that she's your topic of discussion these days." He said, smirking as he waved Meredith over.

--

What was he doing?! Luring her into the deathtrap? He was meat, raw meat to be exact, and every one of those lions wanted him. Why bring her in to get slaughtered before he got mauled? It didn't make sense?! Meredith sighed and reluctantly stood up, meandering slowly over to the group of people Derek was entertaining.

She smiled widely as she approached their colorless faces, and rested her head against Derek's shoulder as he slid an arm around her waist.

"Hello there." She smiled, biting back the urge to twist their necks.

--

"Nurse, this is my girlfriend, Meredith." He said, planting a kiss on the cheek, laughing as the nurses faces turned green. "She's simply amazing. Funny, smart, and extremely beautiful. I'm just oh so lucky to have her, even if I'm going to have to deal with her tiny ineffectual fists later." He nodded, grinning at them. "So, the rumors that have been flying, should stop. She's not a stripper, she was never pregnant, but I love her. And I still would, even if she was a pregnant stripper who had an abortion." He nodded, turning Meredith around as he did, and started to walk down the hall with her, leaving the nurses behind with a tear-filled expression.

Meredith let out an infectious giggle, already changed out of her scrubs. Derek had also changed out of his early, but her giggle caused him to laugh, spreading like a disease.

"You, Dr. Shepherd, are terrible. In so many ways." She added, laughing as she slid her hand into his, stopping dead in front of the doors. The drizzle from early had turned to an all-out down pour. She frowned, knowing very well that any time in rained in Seattle there was lightening, and lightening meant thunder. He hand tightened around Derek's and he smiled as she did, drawing her close to him.

"Don't worry. I won't let it get you." He whispered into her hair, feeling her muscles relax. He grinned and led her out the door, sighing as an inevitable crack of thunder erupted the second they stepped out, causing her to jump and run closer to him. He laughed slightly and stopped her to face him, her hair and clothes already starting to soak through, the same as his. His hand reached up to push a stray piece of damp golden hair out of the way.

"Don't worry." He whispered, leaning in to kiss her, his lips landing on hers. Meredith let out a sigh of pleasure and opened her mouth to let him deepen the kiss. He smiled and slid a hand around her waist.

--

Meredith opened her eyes for a moment and playfully pushed him away, running for his car door and shrieking slightly as another clap of thunder erupted. She grinned at Derek's scowling figure in the rain. She laughed and swung the door open, quickly sliding inside, waiting for him to join her. He couldn't resist, he never had been able to. Derek slid into the driver's slide, pulling her hand into his and revved the engine after sliding the key into the ignition.

"I love you." He whispered as he pulled out of the parking lot, causing Meredith to smile and kiss his cheek.

"I love you too Derek." He said, her head nuzzling into the crook of his neck.

* * *

**This is a new day.**

"Did he really say that to her?" Christina asked questioningly as they dressed in the locker room.

Izzie had finally come around about twelve cups of coffee later, George had come around slightly easier, and Alex had been the easiest. He practically didn't care.

"I can see McDreamy saying that.' Izzie chirped in, laughing slightly.

Meredith grinned and tossed her golden hair into a loose bun, pulling down her scrub shirt, she nodded.

"Yes sir he did. You should have seen the look on McFrizzy's face." She said with a mischievous smile, slamming her locker shut, and standing up. She gave a small wave over her shoulder as she walked out and went towards the nurse's station to grab her charts, only to find McFrizzy sitting frozen behind the desk.

She looked as if she were about to stutter, or about to blow up. Meredith couldn't quite pin her attitude. She quickly tried to grab her charts, but the nurse was too quick, slamming her hand on them before Meredith could get them.

"If you really think you have what it takes to please Dr. Shepherd, you're wrong. You're just filling a void." She muttered before letting go of the files, jumping at the quick appearance of a familiar resident.

"Excuse me Nurse Walcott? Did you just say what I think you said. I hope not for your sake. When my interns have a bad day, I have a bad day. And I'm not happy when I have a bad day, it reflects on you. So you better keep your nose out of her business before I make you run errands all around this hospital. Ya damn teenage gossipers. Are we clear?" Bailey snapped, crossing her arms at the nurse, she had come to like Meredith.

"Yes, Dr. Bailey." The nurse gulped, giving a glance at Meredith before politely handing her papers to her.

"Thank you." She mumbled under her breath as Dr. Bailey and she walked away.

"Don't thank me; I'm already having a bad day, add a gossip filled nurse to bring down my bright and shiny exterior." She said, turning in the opposite direction of Meredith, causing her to laugh.


	9. Chapter 9

This chapter is mainly a filler until I have something big. I am accepting suggestions seeing as I am in a small fit of writer's block. Don't worry though, new update probably later tonight or tomorrow. This is all in Meredith's perspective, the song is "Hotel Roosevelt" by Augustana. Review and Love, you have to love it, it's practically pure Mer/Der fluff. Haha

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Grey's Anatomy. If I did, we would have a show all year long, and Patrick Dempsey would be working with no shirt on.**

**

* * *

**

**Last call, for the moon tonight,  
Read all, rain on Friday night,  
Take back all the things I said,  
Lay down, rest your pretty head now...**

Meredith leaned back against the cold, wood door. She blinked a few times, the glass in her hand getting warmer by the minute. It had been cold when she picked it up, but she hadn't moved her hand once, so it was slowly warming up. The tequila inside wasn't enough to make her happy, one thing could, and it wasn't even home. It was tied up in some life saving procedure. Sure it was selfish, but she was the one in need of life saving.

Her week had been hell, and Meredith was quite sure that a few more weeks would be like this. Her nose scrunched at the smell of the tequila. Usually it did it for her, even in the days she had been away from Derek. But now, his McDreamyness had gone and ruined all that for her. He ruined everything, but he did it with flare and passion and made Meredith giggle when she thought it wasn't even possible.

**Last call, no more drinks tonight,  
And it's not your fault, its time to walk away from,  
This velvet box, full of alcohol,  
And TV talks, gone on far too long**

She sniffled slightly and shifted her back as it became sore leaning against the door. Meredith had done this before, with Christina, Izzie, even with George. The bathroom was turning into their confession spot. But no one was home, she was alone. Dreadfully, painfully, and sadly alone. Meredith hit her head slightly in her attempt to shift and moaned. How could one nurse, a frizzy nurse at that, cause so much hell in one person's life.

**Take anything that's better for me...  
Take anything that's better for you...  
Take anything that's better for me...take it now...**

Meredith stood up, shakily, and made her way into the kitchen, dumping her tequila right down the drain. She frowned and scowled and felt like throwing a five year olds fit. She wanted to drink tequila instead of be miserable. She ran a hand back through her golden hair and jumped slightly as the door clicked. Meredith frowned, confused this time. No one was supposed to be home, not even Alex. Not like Meredith even wanted Alex around.

**Shut up, I'm wrong, I know...but we can't talk about it,  
All the wars we won, but we're still walking home,  
Don't give me your reasons, for all my bad intentions,  
New York...LA..hey man, you know it's all the same...**

"Hello?" she said, peeking around the corner.

"Why, hello there." Derek said from the shadows of the coat closet.

Meredith jumped, not expecting the shadowed figure to be Derek who was supposed to be saving someone else's life, not that she wasn't happy to see him of course. Meredith grinned once she regained her composure and picked up her pace to skip to him, jumping onto him as her arms landed across his neck.

"Whoa, my Meredith is bright and shiny." Derek said, grabbing her so she wouldn't fall. "A change, but a nice one." He grinned as she planted a kiss on him, muffling his last few words.

"Yes she is, because you're home." Meredith said through another kiss. She stepped down and pushed his shoulder slightly, playfully. "But what are you doing home? I thought you were off saving a life." Meredith grinned, still slightly confused.

"They asked me too, but Dr. Forrester was on duty and didn't get off for another shift." He said, grinning as he shut the closet door behind him. "And I heard about the nurse, you know, the frizzy one, and I figured that you would want me home." He said, passing her, but still grabbing her hand as he made his way into the kitchen, pulling her along.

"You heard?" she asked through another frown, probably her twentieth of the night. "How did you hear?" she folded her arms, pulling her hand from his.

"Umm, word got around?" he blurted out quickly, shrugging as he turned away and into the fridge. He grabbed a water and turned back around the meet Meredith's glare. "Fine, Christina. Oh, and Izzie. You're lucky you look so cute when you're mad, or else I would have never told you."

"Oh really now?" she asked, making her way over to him. She kissed his cheek lightly and slipped her hand into his. "How 'bout now?" she whispered.

"Maybe, if you were lucky." He laughed slightly.

"Hmm, still stubborn." She muttered as she moved her lips to his mouth, landing with a light kiss that slowly turned deeper into a passionate one. "How about now?" she asked as she pulled away and rested her head on his chest.

"I guess, you really know how to get a guy to admit everything, don't you?" he asked, slipping his arms around her tiny waist.

"I do." She laughed slightly, her hand sliding up to his shoulder. "Well, even if you're home for a terrible reason, I'm happy you are."

Derek grinned into her hair, taking in its lavender scent.

"Me too." He said finally, leaning back against the fridge.

**Last call, everyone go home,  
And take all the LA rain in,  
Because it won't fall too much more this year,  
The summer's gone, but I'm still right here...**


	10. Chapter 10

**ITALICS ARE FLASHBACKS.  
This is a very minimal drama chapter, but there will be more, you have not seen the last of Dr. Stanley. Comments are appreciated and I hope you like this chapter, I love hearing what you think. The song is in bold and it is called "Fly me too the Moon" by Frank Sinatra.  
Comment, Love, and Read. : **

* * *

_"Come on Dr. Grey, one drink? One night?" he nudged her arm. Dr. Stanley stared down at Meredith, his eyes held nothing. "It can't be that bad can it?" he urged._

_"Sorry Dr. Stanley, I can't. I'm too busy." Meredith heard herself robotically reply like she had since he started asking her out, which was at least once every two days for over two months._

_"Grey, you can't turn me down anymore." He said slightly more forcefully, gripping her wrist tightly when she turned to leave._

_Meredith looked down at her wrist and yanked it away. "I can, and I will." She said quiet enough for only him to hear and not the on looking nurses. She turned on her heals and quickly made her way down the hall._

Meredith slammed her locker door shut and ran a final thread of fingers through her hair. It shook loose easily, falling below her shoulders in its unruly and uncut mess of a beautiful way. She slipped her feet into her leopard and black print ballet flats then made her way out of the locker room. The hall was quiet, practically bare, which was unusual for such a busy hospital.

She made her way towards the main lobby, fully expecting Derek to be sitting in the same chair he always did, watching the hallway warily for her. Well he had sat there since their outburst in front of the whole hospital. Meredith meandered slowly, hoping to make Derek anxious. She grinned to herself as his figure materialized before her, slumped over in his chair, his head propped up on his hand. She made a beeline for him, hoping to reach him before his head came up.

Too late, his head came up along with a charming smile, and she grinned as well. But a voice stopped her from taking another step, a voice she hoped to leave in Boston.

"Ahh, Dr. Grey" John Stanley, the doctor who never seemed to get the message, stepped towards her, his grin practically sickening. "I thought I might find you here."

Meredith froze, she stammered for words. Her heart came to a thud instead of a light beat like it usually was when she saw Derek. Derek's face became concerned, questioning, and quite frankly it became scrambled.

* * *

Who was this man? He was hitting on Meredith, but she didn't seem too thrilled. Derek frowned, shifting in his seat, his stance ready to tackle the man in front of Meredith. He noticed her glance uneasily at him and made that his cue to rush to her side, become her knight in shining whatever. Derek smirked and picked up his briefcase, changing his smirk to a smile as he wandered over to Meredith. 

"Hey honey, I was waiting for you." He grinned as he snaked an arm around her frail waist, his grin becoming adorably lopsided as he turned to look at the man in front of Meredith.

* * *

A rush of relief ran through Meredith's body as she felt his comfortable arm slip around her. Meredith smiled in return, feeling more empowered now around the cold Dr. Stanley. 

"Oh, I'm sorry to keep you waiting." She said with a small giggle as she tip-toed up to peck his cheek.

Meredith turned to look at John, his mouth practically agape as he saw the two. She smiled, moving Derek's arm from around her waist so that she could slip her hand into his, lacing their fingers.

"Dr. Stanley, this is my boyfriend, Derek Shepherd." Meredith stated proudly, watching the two shake hands.

"Wait, Derek Shepherd as in Head of Neurosurgery, world renowned? You're dating Meredith, a new found resident?" John asked, practically scoffing. Maybe it was jealously, maybe it was mocking. Either way, it was setting Derek off.

"Yes I am, she's quite amazing. I'm amazed that you didn't try once or twice when she was in Boston." Derek replied calmly back, biting his tongue at the urge to snap back at him. Derek smiled once again, turned to look at Meredith. "You ready to go Hun?"

"Yes I am." She smiled, looking back at John. "Nice seeing you again." She waved as Derek turned her around, leading her towards his car. Meredith could have sworn she heard John mumble something

under his breath about her being a tease, but she shook it off, grinning up at Derek.

"Thank you." She said earnestly as he opened the car door. "For that I mean, well opening the car door too. Both really, both were nice. I'm rambling again, I need to stop."

"I think it's cute, adorable in fact." He grinned as he slid into his own car seat, plugging the key into the ignition. "And you looked like you needed help, and I thought I was just the guy for it. " he nodded as the car pulled out of the parking lot.

* * *

Meredith leaned back against the car seat, closing he eyes slowly as she smiled at Derek. She snaked her hand into his, letting him rub his thumb over her knuckles, soothing her in a way. Meredith giggled slightly, causing Derek to look over at her. 

"What's so funny?" he asked, tilting his head slightly.

"Oh, nothing," she shrugged, biting back the urge to laugh again, "Just remembering the last time you stayed at my house, in the chair."

"It really wasn't that funny." He said, shaking his head in an oblivious way.

"I think it was, but guess what?" she smiled, leaning over to rest her head on his shoulder.

"Do I want to guess?" he asked, receiving a light punch in his arm. Derek let out a hearty laugh and shrugged. "Fine, what?"

"I don't really want to tell you know." She said, shaking her head and sticking out her lower lip in a pouting face.

"Oh that's cruel." He scowled as he put the car in park, finally reaching her driveway. "Very, very cruel indeed."

"It's your own fault." She said, laughing as she passed him, walking up to her front door.

"You are very mean tonight, more than usual." He said, reaching the door as she shoved it open, sticking her tongue out at him.

"Well then, no surprise for you." She said, tapping the bridge of his nose as she wandered up the stairs, disappearing in the door of her room.

Derek followed after her, smiling to himself at her childness. It was almost as adorable as her angry attitude. Derek pushed her door open more than it was and collapsed onto her bed, breathing in the lavender scent and the overall Meredith scent. She reappeared in the doorway of her bathroom, completely changed into her sweats and ratty Dartmouth t-shirt, scowling as she usually did.

"Heyyyyy, I said no surprise." She said, folding her arms. "No bed for you."

"Mannn, that hurt's my feelings. Your mean." He said, sitting up against the headboard, his lower lip sticking out much like hers did when she pouted.

**Fly me to the moon**

**Let me sing among those stars**

**Let**** me see what spring is like**

**On Jupiter and M****ars**

"Oh I'm gonna do more than hurt your feelings." She muttered as she snatched her pillow up off the ground, whacking Derek in the head with it, while letting out another infectious giggle.

"Hey!" he laughed, grabbing his own pillow and hitting her gently in the waist with it. Derek threw the pillow and grabbed her waist with his arm, pulling her down and pinning her beneath him. She giggled, causing Derek to laugh and hold her hands down tighter above her head, watching her squirm.

"Now this is not fair." She stated, shaking her head.

**In other words, hold my hand**

**In other words, baby kiss me**

"Well, until you tell me what you were going to say, I'm not letting you move." He shook his head, showing her his determination to keep her pinned.

"Fiiiiine, you jerk. I was going to let you sleep in my bed instead of in the chair." Meredith nodded, giggling again as she felt him release his grip and sit upright.

"Well then, that's a different story." He smiled, moving to lie down beside her.

**Fill my heart with song**

**Let me sing for ever more**

**You are all I long for**

**All I worship and adore**

Meredith laughed and hit the switch on the light, and kissing him lightly. She slid into his arm, her torso fitting in his and their breathing becoming rhythmic.

"Goodnight Meredith, I love you." Derek whispered, smiling as he dug his face into her mess of lavender scented hair.

"Night Der, I love you too." She smiled as well, letting herself drift off into a peaceful sleep.

**In other words, please be true**

**In other words, I love you**

Derek watched her sleep for another few moments, then finally drifted off himself, Meredith still dancing around his mind.


	11. Chapter 11

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Grey's. If I did, there would be no such thing as a break for them.**** It would just be year around Patrick Dempsey, with happy Mer/****Der**** moments thrown in.**

**This is a chapter to start my drama filled, two or three part update. :**

**This is part one, part two tomorrow and maybe part three tomorrow or ****saturday**

**Hope you like my STARTING drama, ****haha**

**REVIEWS.**

_"Dr. Stanley, this is my boyfriend, Derek Shepherd." Meredith stated proudly, watching the two shake hands.__"Wait, Derek Shepherd as in Head of Neurosurgery, world renowned? You're dating Meredith, a new found resident?" John asked, practically scoffing. Maybe it was jealously, maybe it was mocking. Either way, it was setting Derek off.__"Yes I am, she's quite amazing. I'm amazed that you didn't try once or twice when she was in Boston." Derek replied calmly back, biting his tongue at the urge to snap back at him. Derek smiled once again, turned to look at Meredith. "You ready to go Hun?"Yes I am." She smiled, looking back at John. "Nice seeing you again." She waved as Derek turned her around, leading her towards his car. Meredith could have sworn she heard John mumble something __under his breath about her being a tease, but she shook i__t off, grinning up at Derek._

Derek leaned back in his office chair, setting down his cup of extra strong coffee, finishing it off in hopes that he could stay awake long enough to leave with Meredith, instead of just sleeping in an empty on-call room. He frowned as he thought back to the arrival of the new attending. When he had signed the papers for the transfer he had had no idea that the man could even know Meredith, now he was calling her a tease behind her back? Derek wanted to punch himself in the face. But one simple click of the lock on his door made him remember why he wouldn't punch himself. Only one other person had the key, her.

"Oh, I didn't think you'd be in here." Meredith said quietly as she stepped in, fumbling with the door knob.

"Well Meredith, it is my office. Hence the nameplate that says Derek Shepherd. Usually that would indicate that—" he smirked as he spoke, but was soon cut off.

"Okay, I get it. Stupid remark. I'll go find an empty on call-room." Meredith had been on edge since Stanley had arrived, she turned on her heals to leave.

"No!" Derek jumped quickly, running to close the door before she made her way out it. "I don't mean it like that at all." He blurted out as fast as he could. He snaked his hand around Meredith's, and pulled her over to the couch, pulling her down beside him. "What been up with you lately Mer?" he asked, a concerned look spread across his face.

Meredith had jumped slightly when he ran, but a small, meek smile spread across her face when he pulled her to the couch with him. Her fingers wriggled free and she wringed her hands together, biting down on one lip as she concentrated hard on her shoes. Derek was right, something was up.

"I just….it's….I…" she couldn't get the words out, yet. "I just keep seeing Dr. Stanley and I remember Boston, which I really don't want to remember. Then I sit here, and I wanted into your office to hide, then I sit down, and I start rambling, then I regret what I say, and I keep rambling because it's awkward." She finally stopped, her first breath after a minute being a deep one.

"Oh, Meredith." Derek sighed slightly and pulled her closer to him, feeling her melt into his chest, his favorite feeling. His shirt became fisted in her fists as she sniffled against his chest. "Meredith, the rambling is very adorable, but I gave you a key to my office for a reason." He laughed slightly and he rubbed small circles in her back. "And I'm going to try my best to keep Dr. Stanley away from you, and I'm sorry that I can't fire him, cause everyone knows I want to." Derek whispered against her hair, breathing in lilac as he spoke. Meredith relaxed a little, the tension releasing ever so slightly.

"Okay," she finally said in a steady tone, unwavering. "Thank you Der, really." She smiled against his chest, peeling her head away for a minute to look up at him, kissing him lightly on the lips.

_BEEP_

Derek groaned and Meredith giggled ever so slightly. She fumbled for her pager, reading the 911 quickly, and planting another kiss on Derek.

"I need to go." She grinned, finally yanking her wrist free of his powerful grip. "Go home Der, you look tired. And I'll actually let you sleep in my bed. I guess." She grinned.

"I'm not leaving until you do. When you're done with your surgery, come get me and we can leave. Together." He smiled, and waved at her figure as it walked out the door, laughing slightly.

--

Meredith surgery lasted over an hour, and as she went towards the on-call room, she felt more exhausted than ever, ready to grab her chart off the table and meet Derek to head hoe. Meredith shoved the door open and her scrub cap off, flipping the switch to light up the room, and a familiar figure.

"Dr. Stanley." She choked out, reaching for the chart on the table, but not making it far as a hand gripped her wrist tightly, much more tightly than Derek ever would.

"Ahh Meredith, I've been waiting to see you finally, alone." He grinned wickedly, twisting the lock on the door slowly, leaving him and Meredith alone in the empty on-call room.


End file.
